welcome 2

hi i love writing like diaries/journal/blogging. i just love the feeling of writing just EVERYTHING i feel. lately, check-ins with people, God, myself have been so hard. i forget how important they are. having a community, a group of friends, someone you look up to. imagine not having anyone to talk to period its kind of crazy. i usually check in with myself every month or so, not as much as i should. with God, even less. the idea of checking up on others and yourself is SO SO SO important. it’s how you see how you are doing, how others are doing, and what you can do to live a much abundant life in christ. recently, ive been feeling empty. empty in a way where i find my joy in things that are not satisfying my soul eternally. small joys, small amounts of happiness at a time. (not saying small joys are not a good thing, but a joy where it is not everlasting) i find my worldly joy through social media. it’s not sufficient, and when it does not go the way i want it to, i find myself angry and upset. complaining a lot. ranting a lot. gossiping to relieve my burdens. lifting my burdens off my shoulder in the wrong way. the reason why this has been a cycle, and a routine that does not make me happy at all, it is because i don’t check in!!! i dont realize im in this routine, this cycle of be becoming sad and angry at the world. if you’re at a hotel, you want to check in!! why? well you want to let them know that you’re there and ready to sleep, eat, hang out in the room that you have reserved. same thing with people and yourself!!! you want to check in with others, so you let them know that you’re there for them even if they don’t want to talk. you’re always open and ready to catch them if they fall. you check in with yourself, to make sure you’re not so numbed out, but you know that you’re there!! the most important thing about self-love is that YOU are there for YOURself. when you are upset, that you have this head, this mind of yours to get help when needed. to tell yourself that you are loved, and that people surround you with love. CHECK IN CHECK IN CHECK IN!! tellin you it is so soSO SO crucial and important in relationships. send them a little text, meet up with them on the weekends, do little things to just update them. if you are on the receiving side, make sure YOU communicate where you are at. if you’re not ready to tell them, IT IS FINE!! just communicate that. talk to people who want to know where are you at, where you are headed. check in on others and yourself. (i promise i did not forget about checkin in with god. that is another thing).

you’re loved more than you know, you just can’t understand how much.

with love, christine